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Song-meanings
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-----"Snatch" -----
This is about those on the inside of terrible situations that can't find a way out. Be it suicidal tendencies, depression, whatever...this song is written from the outside looking in. Loved ones peering painfully at their loved ones' situations. Holding on no matter how cold and icy they may seem.
"Grind"
One day spent with someone can really change how you see things, especially the world around you and namely the things that overshadowed your inhabitions and fear factor. I spent an entire day with someone I had just met that morning, this person literally worked magic with me and I ended up blinking out many fears that I never would have otherwise. She told me that fears are pretty much liek an anchor, and if someone doesn't step up and rise above them, whatever it is that waits above will always be above them. That, and that wodnerful person are the basis of this song.
I was so shy and had some type of fear resting in me trying to find a way to talk to her that morning, but I did....and she was proven right even before a word from her lips was uttered. I look and see what a fear could have prevented... a wonderful friendship, a wonderful day spent with them, and a new way of seeing things...if it wasn't overcome. So this songs is about blinking out fear before it turns into great loss. Time is so uncertain, so make your opprotunities count.
"Vivid"
Writing this and then looking back and reading when I was finished, showed two different stories all together. As I look back, it seemed to evolve into something I've never written about before. It turned into an almost soliloquy-type lyrical about someone who had either said words he or she did not mean, or was in spite of someone...and didn't try to reconcile until it was too late and they had passed on.
I noticed a significant change in the person involved, going from fearing time and age stealing the remineces of memory with this person as they cherish them greatly...to referring to time as almost a savior and begging it to do its work and clear the memories from him so the guilt and the hurt would finally wash away.
I guess it can be taken in through many ways, you'll hafta go with yor own interpritation I guess.
Even to this moment, to me, I have no idea what this is about.
-----"Icebreaker" -----
This is about regret....without a doubt the biggest regret of my life. The terrible part about being human is the things we end up regretting later on, are things we're too incompetent and clueless to common sense in the present. Somethings never stop hurting, and it's because of this.
Shatterstar
I wanted to write a song, that's almost insane to the point of being so carefree. Something that's in parallel with the quote 'Only after we've lost everything, are we free to do anything.' Well, this is basically saying ''who cares what tomorrow brings...live for the moment...anythings possible with desire so get the fuck up and run with it!'
"Bliss"
A good friend of mine was forced to do stuff by his ex-girlfriend at one point....upon thinking about this, I remembered something in the news about a lady who kept her husband locked ina cellar at all times until she wa slooking for some sort of intimacy....really fucked up stuff, you know? Well, this is about that, with a better ending of course.
I also wanted to write a song in which the music was influenced heavily by Green Day and Saves The Day, here it is. =)
"Spite 35"
About someone very close to me losing themselves into drugs.
"Line of Sight"
Originally entitled 'Amy's Involved'...this was written at the time of 'Four Month Blackout'. A fairly close friend of mine thought it was her fault that her best friend cut her wrists, even though the reasoning made no sense. It's jsut an overall basis song saying stuff is not always as bad as it seems, and youre never alone.
"Pull"
Pull is about that one backstabbing asshole we all know in our lives.
"Fiend Of Mine"
Sequeled to 'pull'....Hey, we all know one =)
"Embrace"
This one is about smiling at every bit of opposition life throws, even the wicked stuff we've done in our pasts....there is always a silver lining on every cloud.
"This Town"
Coming home from college was strange...when i got back it felt as if I had moved on but this place stayed really stagnant and unevolved. As if nothing changed, along with most people that live here too. As if they we're trapped ina freezeframe. This is basically about the odd feeling presented when I came back
"Submerge"
Going thru an old notebook with numerous pages of the poetry I've written, this one really seemed to stick out. Maybe because it's so simple, but very visual to me. This one is about letting moments slip by that are irreplacible. We only have a short amount of time to breathe on this earth, so don't ever be scared to take risks. =)
"Vitality"
Unspoken words, still very afraid to tell that certain someone
"Watercolor Faces"
This actually started off as a poem as well, in it's entirety, it's about the life and free spirited person in ourself that we lose with each day bringing forth. When we're young we're so full of spirit and joy, and somewhere along the way we become expressionless. The name comes from a mask I saw once. It's very similar to a Japanese Kabuki mask I saw in a store window by where I go to school, the paint was tarnished and nearly melting off the thing. In troubled times, I can see how looking at that would almost be like looking into a mirror.
"Namesake"
Dan and Rob went to a concert, and brought this kid named Wedl. He was insane, he bled from his tailbone all over the hotel, lied compulsivly, had a porn addiction as well as a few others. He's the MOST insane person I've ever met in my life.
"Slipping"
Kinda a state of confusion for me....as we age, our memory starts to fade, I dont understand why people that will one day become like that, give so much grief to those who got there first.
"Gave Up"
Originally entitled Torn, I'm jsut expressing the line in everyone when we can't take a situation any farther, and we have no choice but to throw in the towel.
"Bittersweet"
This describes how well repressed memories...as painful as they may be, actually become part of us.
"Broken Dream"
Written a long time ago, when hitting bottom seemed inevitible. Strating in April of 99' until the end of October or so, I felt empty...nothign inside whatsoever. This is about that.
"{Pseudo}Fuck You"
- A dedication to anyone that breathes obsessive, that is overly emotional and can't take anything with a grain of salt and get a clue when so many of them have been dropped like a blitzkrieg. Some people plain and simple suck, and they need therapy. This personw hom this is dedicated was the initial reason 'Icebreaker' had to be written, if I hadnt have known or have never been introduced to this sadomaschostic psycho, the situation I was in...and loved...would never had faded, and there would be no regret. I still wish I would have never had said I wanted to talk to this person. Something I heavily regret. Anyway, this unstable person and her psycho friend called me 'Pseudofuck' for some dumbass reason. This is her dedication.
"Untitled"
Self Explanitory- This was the first version of Vitality.
"Wake"
While writing this, i thought of disensitization, and my first ever time being approached by a homeless person. I started wondering where abouts in life we lose feeling. At such a young age, seeing that gets to us and we want to do anyhting we can do to help, but as we grow we seem to lose touch with our humanity. We treat them, and other victims as almsot non existant even thought all theyve come to know is basically how to cry..., but in the same right, we forget one day that might be any of us. Why should we expect different than our very own actions?
"Kevin"
A loved one of mine, a sister, is being treated horribly by her significant other, physically...everything. Hes beating her up. ...this is my dedication to that dick.
"Aphrodesinsomnia"
What do you think? =)
We needed to do a partial instrumental song, and we used the same subject as our old recording called the 'M Song'
"M357"
The original title to this was 'Medicated Dream' I got in a car accident and was heavy medicated for a few weeks, well the meds ended up giving me really bad nightmares. I compared it to someone I didn't like being around in song form. M357 is the code on the drug Vikatin, which I had to take alot of. Clever, huh?
"Lady Blossom"
-TEMPORARILY LOST-
There are 2 seperate versions of this song...in fact, the 2nd is where 'Icebreaker' orignated. Both are somewhere..umm..in my closet or something, they'll be found soon =)
"Atom and Eve"
This is about the atrocoties of war. The first part of this personifies war as a 'her'. The middle refers to the atom bomb. The thirs refers to how people high in power make valor in war with using a god-like appearence and stature, and the end part refers to Pearl Harbor itself. I dunno...wanted to write a song with a conflict themme, and here it is...
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